fix you

we try our best to fight in our own. we got the same destiny. i finally understand how hard to fight everything, to makes our live be better in the future. i wish we were in the same way till the end. i know there will be storm also sunny day, but i hope we could be together till the end. im not give up on you. i hope you feel the same. i love you bhis, you're my only hope.

if some day, after i do all the best of me for you, for this relationship but i found you cheat on me again i think i never believe what is love. but for now, i will fight for me, us, also our future. 

i want to live together with you mas dio

i want to feel how it feels to be your wife

take care of you and our family

growing old with you

i want to be a good mother who is take care her family with all of my heart

i want to be a good sister for your siblings

also want to be a good daughter in front of your parents.

i want to feel how safe to always have you besides me mas.

i didn't know if someday you hurt me again or there's something to spare us apart.

thank you for always taking care of me

always patient with me

always hug me went im no feeling well

im sorry for all of yelling that i've been done to you, i just don't know why i do that to you.

i love you mas

i wish we can make it till the end.

eventho at the end we can't, i wanna thankyou for all those warm hug that you gave to me.

i hope you'll find your own happiness.

im glad to be part of your life.

messed up

everything is messed up. i'm messed. we are didn't same like a year ago. how long i can hold all of this shit? the trauma, trust issues, anxiety, panic attack. how long? maybe you're already tired of me too, of us. maybe this relationship is not working anymore. i feel like im not important for you anymore, im not ur priority anymore. i feel like you make distance between us. 

i hope it will be forever

 we're were have mistakes. it will make you stronger or it will broke you to the piece. 

i love you bhsm, with all of my heart. i never been treat so fucking good, feels so inloved by you. i miss you. just you that's i have. i need you in every sec in my life. i wish we met sooner so i never getting hurt by the asshole guy. you can read in this blog, thats all about brokenhearted. the way people destroy me to the ground but i have to get up and dress up like nothings happened. i wish we can grow old together. i love you. i really love you. even sometimes we argue little things, its about ego. relationship is not about who's win or lose. but about who's stay till the end, who's hug you when you feeling down, always take care each other, also makes happy memories. i never expect will have you right now. together with you when the last time i was give up on us. i think you just the same like anyone else, just took advantage of me. but no, you take care of me. you make my day brighter everyday. and yes im fallin in love with you everyday. i don't know where we going, but i hope you will stay with me forever.